


Heart Ache

by tKing



Category: Homestuck
Genre: M/M, References to Addiction, References to Depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-07
Updated: 2016-11-07
Packaged: 2018-08-29 16:03:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8496460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tKing/pseuds/tKing
Summary: Your name is Dirk Strider, and you don't know what to do anymore.





	

Your name is Dirk Strider, and you don't know what to do anymore.

Your boyfriend, or ex-boyfriend, just broke up with you and you don't know what to do. He was all you had left, the reason to live. Your brother died years ago and Roxy gave up trying to console you before any of this even happened. You're alone in this, and it hurts. His words stung worse than anything, and it hurts. It hurts so much. Jake left a note on your fridge when you woke up today.

"Dirk,

I'm sorry, but I don't think I can do this anymore. I wish I could, but I can't. Not anymore. I can't be your reason to live, Dirk. I just can't. So I'm leaving, and breaking up with you so that you can learn to depend on yourself.

Good luck, chap.

-Jake"

And along with that, he blocked you on pesterchum. You just want to hear him say "I love you." again. You just want him to comfort you again. You just want him again. You hate yourself. You hate how you act, how desperate you are. You hate how you have to depend on people, but you don't think you could depend on yourself even if there was a gun to your head. Maybe if there was a gun to your head you'd be happy.

You have a feeling that Jake went to Jane. You have a feeling that he told her that you two broke up and that he loved her instead. You have this feeling and god, it makes your gut twist into an uncomfortable knot.

So that's why you're on the kitchen floor, whiskey bottles surrounding you, crying. You gave up. With Jake there it was easy to try to forget about your drinking habits. Your addition. But you can't do it anymore. Relapse.

You wish you weren't so weak. You wish you could have kept him from leaving. God, you loathe yourself. So you drink. And drink. And don't stop drinking. You drink your troubles away. Maybe your liver will fail. That'd be nice.

All that you know is, is that you're all alone, and you hate it.


End file.
